Then biotch, better make it count by taking your call in one of these babies:
These booths are just begging to be occupied!
YES! Gorg, right? These booths are just BEYOND sassy, with their new paint jobs…and look at the floors too:
Go ahead...
EAT OFF ME!
These are painted in the company’s logo colors using Benjamin Moore’s Impervex latex enamel paint. It’s water based, so the dry time is substantially less than oil based enamels, but it still took me about 4 days to WERK these two ladies out! Red being the absolute biotch of a color that she is to paint with, and b/c every surface in both of these booths was some kind of weird laminate-y horrid glossy surface, I had to use a primer. I used Benjamin Moore’s Stix Waterborne Bonding Primer, which sounds like some sort of torture method. It too is water-based, so it was really easy to use and dried really quickly. Here’s what that step looked like:
Primed...
...more primed...
...more more primed...on the ceiling too!
I hit both booths with two coats of primer. Then painted both out with at least two coats of paint each. The red lady was all kinds of finicky, as pointed out earlier, so of course she ended up getting like 4 coats. Honestly, I could of done even more, but she wasn’t the only thing on the agenda for this office makeover, the selfish skank! The linoleum floors got some love by being scrubbed and then reconditioned with a generous coating of boiled linseed oil, which is just God’s gift…that stuff works on ALL KINDS OF SURFACES…AMAZE!
I know I look good but keep painting...I'll look better!
Y’all know how much a I just j’adore Thrift Whore Thursdays…and as much whoring as I do, I’ve seen A LOT of cra cra in these thrift stores, but I still get backslapped when I come across food! Damn!
Betty might be bothered by this, y'all!
Sugar and spice this bread mix ain't nice!
And lest y’all forget, may I present:
Well, shut the...FLUFF you!
But WAIT, there’s more y’all:
REALLY?!
I’m pretty sure mixed grains would be the last thing your baby would be getting from this box…happy whoring folks!
Y’all I stumbled upon some major thrift treasures at a Salvation Army while out whoring the other day…check this shiot:
That’s full-on marble atop that sassy round side table! Then I saw the price and was style-slain:
YES, biotch, you’re not seeing things…it cost $39.99 value damn dollars!!!
And just what do I spy here, but some kinda cheesy-yet-chic Americana cookie jar?:
And not to be outdone on the cheese-o-meter, this statue presented himself for consideration:
Well, shut the FU$& y’all, how to choose? Don’t…and buy them BOTH, they’re so cheap! Scandal! The cookie jar I’d leave ‘as-is’, but statue face I’d repaint…maybe even in matte white? Or a fun & unexpected poppy color? He’d be soooo cute on a salon-style gallery wall amongst the right mix of art…speaking of, somebody shat out all kinds of tremendous 80′s GIANT-ass paintings at this store, that had me choking:
AND
Oh, but WAIT, there’s more!:
These yarn art lovelies gave me shivers:
And:
Absolutely style-slapped! This was fun too:
What a rush, y’all!!! Happy whoring AND happy Valentines Day– hope it’s filled with all kinds of hotness?!?!
Well damn if NYC and vicinity hasn’t had it’s fair share of heinous weather and now Nemo is upon us!!! In fact, as I type this, there’s some sort of air strike sounding siren going off in the distance and I’m not quite sure what it’s alerting me to? Snow? Ice? Nuclear fallout? Since when does NYC use sirens in neighborhoods? Just more drama to add to an already high drama alert situation? YES! See, I wasn’t already amped up enough by all the media coverage on Nemo, so let’s sound some alarms, that probably haven’t been used since the 50′s, to heighten the scene even more! Speaking of, today’s Free Shiot Friday is a real doozie, check it:
Oh she’s a cold one out there today, y’all…but you know some Free Shiot Friday will warm y’all good-n-toasty like nothing else! Like this gal here, who’s sitting all pretty:
Re-hang my door and I'm ready to serve some more!!! YES!
It’s a ‘special sauce’ kinda Thrift Whore Thursday up in here y’all…we got us a theme song! YES! Y’all know your whorin’ always goes that much better when you got some kinda beat or rhythm to shake it to! Well, get ready to get your groove on to this sassy situation…it’s AMAZING!:
Y’all, I’m just beyond delighted to share that through a really twisted, yet divine, turn of events I am dusting off my make-up kit and getting back on the stage! YES! (Some of you Dazzlers may not know, but before all my decorating & styling hilarities, I used to be a full-time actor– it’s the reason I moved to NYC in the first place!) The show is a pop musical experience called, Totally Tubular Time Machine
